Monday, December 13, 2010
Smh
Such mixed feelings, I mean was i really just lost in something that i failed to see what was there or what wasn't. I often wonder was it me.....but I've come to the realization it wasn't just me....the mix signals...what wasn't being said. I wasn't the only one! I'm trying desperately to forgot ALL of it....just not working out like i want it to!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
I got away with my heart intact!
I finally decided its in my best interest to just let go. As much as friends told me to leave it alone or weighed in what they thought was right for my life. At the end of the day it's still my decision and will be done on my time not anyone Else's. I believe now is the right time, to move on from that brief intermission in my life. There are no ill feelings, no animosity just good luck and best wishes.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
I can seem to get away...
I'm not sure if i really want to. There lies the problem...Here i say over and over "please don't call me. I'm good at holding up my end of the deal i would never call. However you continue to call and when you do i accept your calls. I can only avoid them for so long because you continually try and try....try....try....*sigh* You said you didn't want it and i said cool, yet you still hold on and i allow you to hold on. I've attempted numerous time to let go but you won't allow me to. I honestly need to make a clean break and not look back. You can't give me what i deserve....that much i know!
Thursday, August 5, 2010
I think I've finally found some closure on a situation that has been on going for the past couple months. I typically don't have any regrets. However, this is one time i wish i could just rewind and go backwards. This way i could make better choices, but then again everything happens for a reason. Even though I'm still trying to figure out what is lesson learned here. Either way I'm glad i tackled the situation head on and i no longer have any stress over it. I was finally able to completely remove myself from the situation. Its sad because i lost what i think was a good friend. Maybe one day we'll talk again, however i don't think we'll talk again in the near future.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Changes
It's definitely been an interesting two weeks. My emotions were all over place...still are. After working for company for 4 and half years I got laid off. Surprisingly enough I thought I would be more stressed out and worried but I'm not. The ironic thing about this is I finally get a chance to do the things I’ve been talking about for ever. First and most important is to continue obtaining my BA in IT. Second task, to expand my horizons outside of Georgia. So far the school is a go. I spent the first week home trying to finalizing my financial aid for school and trying to get every available grants/funding that's available. It's definitely been a challenge but I've reached a reasonable decision and start classes on the March 22nd.
Now it’s time for me to work on expanding my horizons beyond Georgia. I have been here for about twelve years now and I’m slowly growing a bit weary of the job market and way of life. I seriously crave a change in my normal routine. I honestly don’t feel that job market for IT is very strong here. I would really like to get some feedback from individuals in the same field to get their input. What I find about the Georgia job market is it seems that every company wants to only hire you as temp and pay you at less scale. Most jobs I encounter there’s no room for growing within the company. When it comes to cost of living it’s reasonable but finding a job just seems way too difficult for market that’s suppose to be hot! So with that I have my eyes set to the North but I also have them peeping at Texas. I’m kind of torn between the two cities. Texas to me seems like another Georgia, in terms of the way of life/cost if living etc. My friend has invited my out to come and experience it and I will. Somehow I believe it’s about the same and I’m no longer in that frame of mind anymore. Right now I’m honestly looking for something fast paced and up to speed with where I am right now.
Over the next few weeks and months I really need to sit down and weigh all my options and make a decision.
Now it’s time for me to work on expanding my horizons beyond Georgia. I have been here for about twelve years now and I’m slowly growing a bit weary of the job market and way of life. I seriously crave a change in my normal routine. I honestly don’t feel that job market for IT is very strong here. I would really like to get some feedback from individuals in the same field to get their input. What I find about the Georgia job market is it seems that every company wants to only hire you as temp and pay you at less scale. Most jobs I encounter there’s no room for growing within the company. When it comes to cost of living it’s reasonable but finding a job just seems way too difficult for market that’s suppose to be hot! So with that I have my eyes set to the North but I also have them peeping at Texas. I’m kind of torn between the two cities. Texas to me seems like another Georgia, in terms of the way of life/cost if living etc. My friend has invited my out to come and experience it and I will. Somehow I believe it’s about the same and I’m no longer in that frame of mind anymore. Right now I’m honestly looking for something fast paced and up to speed with where I am right now.
Over the next few weeks and months I really need to sit down and weigh all my options and make a decision.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Worry and more Worry
It's definitely been one "those weeks".
I can' wait for the week to be over and I can find out that information I need to know. All i can is leave it in god's hands and go from there. Of course easier said than done. I find myself constantly worrying ....wondering what if. How did i get here? I shall change. So many mixed emotions i can't even get them out the way i want it. I think maybe if i write them down it will help. However I don't even know where to start. I shall blog some more once I've cleared my mind.
I can' wait for the week to be over and I can find out that information I need to know. All i can is leave it in god's hands and go from there. Of course easier said than done. I find myself constantly worrying ....wondering what if. How did i get here? I shall change. So many mixed emotions i can't even get them out the way i want it. I think maybe if i write them down it will help. However I don't even know where to start. I shall blog some more once I've cleared my mind.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Tuesday 2/9/10 @ 12pm
I have no idea what's going on with me, however lately I have all this excess energy. I have this great need to go out meet new people, discover new places, new opportunities. Anyone that's knows me I'm not one for stepping out my comfort zone. However I've been needing and/or wanting to do this for a minute now. Now the question is how do i go about stepping out of this zone. I find boredom is trying to pushing me back into that zone but I refuse to let it happen. I've made some changes with my exercise routine in attempts to push my self. I still need other changes. stayed tuned we shall see how this works out.
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